Teens, teens everywhere

 So, last week, Emma turned 13. She's officially a teen. I feel like we got a grace period with Jackson and he didn't really start being a true teen until 14. 

I was putting his childhood items away yesterday and having waves of saddness assail me. No one warns you about how damn sad it is to put away your kid's special stuffies and blankets and trucks and things they loved and couldn't go without. 

Last summer, Jack all of a sudden took his "Beary and Monkey monk" from the corner of his bed and chucked them on the floor. He told me he was done with them and I nearly cried right there in front of him. And the dumb thing is, I WANT him to grow up and be a man and do all the things he is going to do. But, my goodness do I miss that little, sweet blond headed, grubby boy! The little boy who was never happier then when he was building something out of tape, or cardboard and popcicle sticks. Or the boy who would snuggle up to me ALL the time because that's how he felt safe. 

Oof. I think I've cried more about him growing up than I ever did when we were dealing with some of the really hard stuff when he was young. 

I think back on it now and I am astonished by how faithful God has been in so many situations regarding Jack. 

When we were really struggling with his constant nighttime accidents, I had no idea what was happening or what to do to help him. I remember laying in my bed one Sunday morning, very early, awake because he had woken me up for the 3rd time in one night, completely soaked. I got on my phone and started looking at Facebook for bed wetting groups. When he got up, he was sitting by me on the couch, really down because of course he hated what was happening and had no control over it at all. 

I pulled the group up and showed it to him. There were like 1200 people in the group and I told him, Jack look at all these people who are dealing with the same thing. You aren't alone and it's not unusual and we will find help for you. I don't think I will ever forget the look he gave me when I said that. Hope, trust, relief. 

Because of that group I found a program called Therapee and though it took a while, it worked! He went from completely flooding his bed sometimes multiple times a night, to small little spots, to days between wettings, to weeks and then months. He had a few relapses when he was under stress, but never as bad as it was before we did the program. 

Something that I did right. Thank God!

There are many more that I will write about at some point. I want to remember the stories and the times because I am on uncertain footing now with him. He's 15 and growing more and more away from me, AS HE SHOULD, but ouch it feels awful. And I miss my little boy. I never expected the grief I feel about him growing up. 

Emma Joy is so different in every way and has never needed me the same way that Jack does. I would say in fact, that she has gotten closer to me in the last handful of years, because she decided she needed me when she started going through puberty. 

She has always been so much more independant and capable than the other two, I find myself wanting to be careful that she knows that she doesn't always have to have everything together. She's allowed to need help and to ask questions and not know! She was really upset a few weeks ago when she was doing gel on her nails and she messed it up. I came in and helped her fix them, and she cried because she didn't know how to do it the right way. I was like, girl! It's OK for you not to know and need to ask! That's what I'm for! 

She's truly such a cool kid. I like her more and more as she gets older. Her sense of humor is great and her perspectives are interesting and fun. I am really thankful that my kids are turning into people I want to hang out with. On purpose. Because I want to, not because I have too. 

I have so much more to say, but I don't want to keep typing but here are some spring time pictures of my family. 

2026 - A Whole New World

 Holy cow! It's been eleven years since I wrote anything here. In fact, I completely forgot about it. I was confused because I knew when I posted Jackson's birth story, I had included a picture. Apparently, when I posted on my other "pregnancy" blogg, I didn't include it. 

I poked around and was like "ooohhhh yaaaa! My Life in a Nutshell". It's been an age. Almost a life time. 

Three kids, 15, nearly 13 and 10. I can't even begin to encapsolate all that has gone on since 2015 to now. Hopefully I have done some maturing and learned some good lessons and I have definitely had a lot of fun, a lot of stress, a lot of heartache and lots of messing around and doing nothing productive. 

In fact that is kind of why I decided to do a post. I need a hobby. I have been super annoyed at myself for how addicted I am to social media and my effing phone. (I curse a lot these days. I think it comes with being in my forties. Dan thinks it's because of what I listen too. Both can be true... :) 

I find myself just vegging out on my phone instead of doing anything creative or interesting. I have no excuse. I could sew, I could work on the photo books I've been trying to get done for years, I could do puzzles, I could read. I could find something else to do. But I play games and scroll social media instead. 

What a looser.  I want to do better. 

Some things that are going on that I am excited about. 

• We are going on a trip in 27 days. I am so ready for this. We're going to Arizona to see Grandma and then over to Hawaii. It's going to be amazing. I am really excited to show the kids Arizona as it's a completely different world from any they have ever seen or experienced. I am delighted to go back to Hawaii. I love Hawaii. I love the ocean and the air that is like a warm hug carressing you and the vibe and the relaxation of stepping away from normal life and being with the best people on earth. (My family that is. ) 

• Spring - dear God, it might actually be happening. After the coldest, most horrible winter in seventy years, we might finally, on April 23, finally be getting spring. I saw many swans, always a positive talisman, the snow is melting, even though the fields are still completely covered. I know. It's going to be windy as hell tonight and tomorrow, but it should help dry it up and it melts. 
• Jackson is getting into making things again. After a long arduous winter where he was obscessed with calisthenics and then mostly YouTube. He's rebuilding his GoKart and an old crappy quad. I love it. I love his creaitve ability to picture something and then actually get there. He's quite a dude. He finally surpased me in height this last winter and is also a really good looking kid.

• Emma is turning 13 next week. I am so excited. She is becoming such a cool person. Infinitely capabale, smart as a whip, beautiful all with a fantastic sense of humor. She is in the leggy stage of developement along with boobs and increasing curves. She is very much shaped like her dad (lucky girl) and she's going to be a knock out sooner than later. Beautiful smile, blue eyes, lovely wavy hair.  We got her a Gabb phone for her birthday and I know she's going to be so excited about it. It makes me happy to think about giving her the birthday presents I have been plotting to give her for so long. She is also extremely organized and I can rely on her so much even at such a young age. 

• Juliet. Oh Julie wooly. She is a tremendous girl. She has more artistic talent in her little finger, than I have in my whole body. She can whip out the most amazing paintings and crafted creatures as the drop of a hat. She is in the super emotional stage, I remember Emma going through. It's all about helping her deal with her emotions and giving her tools that she can use to not flip out over every small thing. She is so beautiful. Giant blue eyes, contagious smile and giggle and golden brown hair. She's very into fashion and has her own style, which I love. 

• We got a bunch of new clothes for the trip and they are so excited about them and packing and it makes the whole trip even more fun to plan the outfits and the packing and all the little details that are half the fun of going on a trip. 
• Summer is going to be busy and crazy as usual but the thing that I look forward to MOST is blueberry picking. We are going to go camping up at Tangle and pick until I can't stand up anymore. I can't even express fully how much peace and joy I get from sitting on the side of a hill, being attacked by millions of black flies, picking blueberries and listening to audio books. I look forward to it every year and dream about it at times. It's the most wonderful thing in the world. Especially when we get to spend a few nights and not have to worry about driving all the way up and back in the same day. The Mitchells are coming up too, which makes it really fun for the kids. 
• Hopefully Denise will come over to visit. I will tell you about Denise another day. It's a long and intresting story. I have a few that I want to write down here because the really important things need to be remembered in detail so that they don't disappear into the mists of time. It makes me sad whenever I realize just how much of my life I have forgotten already. The benefit of the damn smart phones, is that I have millions of photos and videos to help me remember some things, but there is so much undocumented that I have forgotten. 

So here is a start and hopefully I can begin a habit of writing a bit more. It's a fantastic outlet and something that I have really enjoyed at different times in my life. No promises, but some good intentions anyway. 

Quotes by kids

"There are sooo many Emma's in the whole world and you're my best one!" - Jackson
"Can I drive wetending?" Emma
"Would you like some of my Wetend yummy tea?" - Emma
"Good job singing, Mom." - Emma

"I'm a very special Emma and you're a very special Daddy " - emma
"Why is that lady freaking out?" - Emma
"I AM so cute.!" - Emma after I told her that she wasn't cute.
When explaining to me why he told Valery that he likes Brady better, "She just looks better, Mom." - Jackson

The Beginning of new things

Today is the first day of school for Jackson. I know! WHAT!?!?! How can he be in Pre-K already? I am so excited for him to take this new step. I think the challenge and the change will be so good for him and I can't wait to see how he develops. Of course, there are going to be difficulties. He will have to listen a lot better to his teachers then he does to me. But I think it will be really good.

Emma is now a "helper". She is becoming one too. Though she still spreads ruin and desolation, she does manage to be a help at times too. :) I am so excited that my kids are growing up to become people. I know that's kind of like the sky is blue, but really it sometimes feels like they are always babies and then the world changes and they are different.

I am also getting excited about this little one in my belly. I can't wait till she's born and our family is complete. It will be so fun to see the new dynamic develop. Jack is already so sweet about her and Emma is a natural care taker if ever there was one. I am well aware that there will be fighting and what not, but hopefully there's lots of fun and laughs and family snuggles. Also adventures. I love doing family adventures!

A caring heart

Just a little story that I don't want to forget.

A week or two ago, I was exercising outside, doing wall ball. On the very last rep, I threw the ball up and then looked over at my kids. I caught the ball on my ear which hurt like hell. I started crying and Emma instantly got very upset and started crying too. She came running over to me and threw her arms around my neck, asking if I was OK. And then kissed my head. Then the other night, she headed my with her head when she was attempting to snuggle with me. She cried and cried and my eyes were watering. She put her head down on my shoulder to cry and then looked up still crying, "Mommy, you OK? Sorry Mommy." It was so cute, how she was still so concerned for me though she was hurting herself.

The other fun thing was we told Jackson that he was having a baby last night. His eyes immediately lit up and he poked my stomach and said "for real life?" And then he really wanted to tell everybody. I told him he had to keep it a secret for a little bit longer, but in a few days he could get up and tell everyone, and he was VERY excited about it.

I love my kiddos. They are so fun and I am looking forward to the challenge of another one. : )

Adventures with youngsters

This spring has been one of comparative freedom to the previous years. Emma is old enough to go without a nap in the morning and they can stretch their afternoon nap to 2:30. So we have all the hours between 8 and 2:30 for adventures! 

I love taking them on adventures and seeing how much delight they get from discovering some small hidden puddle, or throwing rocks off a bridge into the water below, or finding our own path through the woods. We have enjoyed our spring very much this year. 

We've visited the island more times then I can count. Usually through in a truck load of rocks off the bridge in the process. We've mud puddles our way around the farm, walked to the very tip of the island, stood in the river in our mud boots to examine the old bull dozers chassy that is in the middle of the slough, we've walked across the frozen Moose pond to see the ponds beyond and summitted the bluff to partake of the view and the crocuses. 

Spring has always been a favorite season of mine and with two adventurous kiddos, it makes it even more magical to come outside after the long winter. 

On to summer with swimming and running around with little to no clothes on and finding all the interesting things there are to find in summer! 

   

My kids are getting BIG!

Emma is getting so big it just amazes me. She has kinda sorta stared potty training. She's peed a bunch of times and pooped once. I don't think she is quite right, but she is not even two yet, so if I see her acting like she is intent, I'll go for it.

She put on all her brothers out door gear tonight. Including one mitten. She is amazing. She talks in whole sentences and even paragraphs. She is learning new words all the time and it is so fun to hear her express herself.

Jackson is also growing and so imaginative. He can make up a game out of anything. He was playing super hero tonight. Saying, "Are you in trouble? Here comes SUPER HERO!" It was quite cute.

We just got back from a trip to see my family and they did really well being in the car for six days. For the most part. What was so fun was seeing them in the pool. Jackson was so brave! He loved the slides and went all by himself and really big one in Grand Prairie. It was so impressive. He just got on and away he went.
Then on the slide in Whitehorse, he would flop around on his belly going head first. He LOVED it! Emma was a lot slower to like the water but after a couple times she really started getting comfortable in it. She liked going down the red slide, but she asked me continually if I was going to hold her. "Mamma hold me? Mamma let go Emma, No?" I told her over and over that I wouldn't ever let her go and she was safe. She was really cute.

She is really sick at the moment and it's so sad to hear her gasping and coughing and sad. She had a fever of 104 today and slept for 3.5 hours this afternoon. I am hoping that with the increase in coughing,  she is starting to have the congestion break up in her chest.

I love my kiddos. I want to make sure that I spend good quality time with each of them so that they feel special.

Jackson and I had a conversation the other night about how much we loved each other. He asked me if I liked him more then I liked Isaac. I told him he was my favorite. He told me he loved me more then Beary. I told him I loved him more then everything. He asked if I loved him more then the moon. And then more then the house and everything in it. And then more then all the stuff I had. I told him that I loved him and Emma and Dad more then anyone or anything else in the world. And then he grinned.

How come they grow up so quickly?

I always have great intentions to get on here and post all about my kiddos; the funny things they do, the hilarious things they say, all the fun stuff that happens that I want to hold onto so I can remember their quickly passing childhoods. But I don't. I forget and look at Facebook instead, or play a racing game. Nothing makes me feel so much like a failure as when I realize their childhood is slipping away without me taking enough notice. 

But it's hard to summon the energy and the Memory when I have a minute to actually get on the computer undestirbed. But I will do better. Recently, Jack has been really into building things. He is very clever at it and I love his inventions! He is great at building train tracks in unique and interesting ways. He builds walls and attaches his cars and heavy equipment together when any fastening device he can conjure up. 

Here is a bridge he built today. What a kid!

Emma is all about people. I seriously can't believe what a social little chappie she is. She visits all the neighbors and like nothing better then opening their doors and ingratiating herself into their lives. She would rather go be with people any day of the week then play with any toy. She also prefers real things to play toys. She disdains things meant for little people and wants only the genuine, WORKING article. She is classic girl though. Loves purses and accessories of all descriptions and hat, coats, shoes, boots, gloves. All the good stuff. She is really making an effort to talk as well. She is using three or four word sentences and is making great strides is the words she can say. She is very verbal. 

Recently she has started shouting at us after we put her into her crib for "hugs!" and "kiees" and won't let us go until we pay attention to her demands. She also likes to just give kisses when she's in trouble. Trying to put oil on the troubled waters. 😊

We have so much fun together and I really want to make sure I enjoy it for all that it is before I'm old and they are grown up! 

Jackson's song

This is a song I made up for Jackson yesterday when he was being a turkey butt. 

"I love you, I love you, even when You're ugly, and even when you are not nice.

I love you, I love you , even when you're nasty and even when you throw a fit.

But I love you more, when you are happy and when you are gentle and kind, and I love you most when you are obedient but I love you all the time."

It's been forever

I am sitting in a service, truthfully not terribly interested in listening to what is being said. So I thought I should maybe do something productive and write about the kids. 

Wow! They are slouch work and so ugh fun right now. Emma is more the ever a spit fire. She is very interested in dollies all of a sudden. She wants to sleep with them, drag them along to child care and have them by at all times.  She is also talking a lot. The other day Dan said he was tired and she said, "Daddy, nap?"  She likes to snuggle down in his bed saying, "Bubba bed, me!" When I am giving Jack something she says, "and me!" 

Of course she is also a little terror, always wanting her way and throwing a fit when I don't let her do or have something. But on the whole, she is sweet and funny and she makes me laugh. She definitely has a gift of friendliness and the ability to engage people.  

Jackson. Oh my Jackson boy. He is definitely being a handful! But he is a delightful boy. He plays so well by himself; building train tracks, bridges, animal fence, or a barn full of hay or make long lines of cars on the road that I made for him on his floor. 

He does have a great sense of humor that usually makes me laugh just as much as him. His newest thing is to make a "toilet tongue". Which is a piece of toilet paper trailing from the lid. Of the potty down to the floor. Then he flushes it. It's really funny. :) 

His very inventive with what he comes up with. He still likes me to make up songs and stories. And now he really likes to be read too, which is all to the good. 

All in all we are doing well and having fun with each other, though of course there are daily battles for listening and being obedient. 

He is also I the middle of potty training through the night. I am really looking forward to having that over with!

One of those days

Wow. Today was one of THOSE days! The kind where you say to yourself over and over, "Oh My God! I'm going to KILL them!!!!"

But then you try to get yourself under control, you try to remember all the little tips and "10 ways to stop yelling at your kids" and for a minute or two, you seem to making progress, until your son is disobedient AGAIN, and he threw ANOTHER fit and hit his sister and then when you are trying to discipline him, starts trying to hit YOU again and then casts himself down, rolling around yelling "NOOOOOOOOOO"!!!!!!!!!!

Yah. It was one of THOSE days. I even went so far as to call Dad to try to get leverage over the Cranky-pants little terror who woke up in my sons bed. Don't know where Jackson went, but the kid who took his place, was not a kid that I wanted to deal with.

One of THOSE days that leaves you feeling like a failure and totally deflated of all the goals for the kind of parent you want to be and the kind of child you want to raise. It leaves you with a surety that life really won't work out OK and that you're going to end up being the nasty person you know is in there, but you've fought long and hard to keep down. And you're going to raise a little hellion that no one likes or wants to be around.

In short. Life SUCKS!

I read these articles about kids who are in the system, or articles about motherhood and how special it is and all the moments and sensations that need to be savored and cherished because your children's childhood is in fact fleeting and soon they will be headed off to college. I sit and weep and think about how much I love my children and how thankful I am for their little arms hugging my neck and their little kisses on my face and their laughs when I tickle and play with them.

And then I have another one of THOSE kind of days. And in the middle of THOSE kind of days, all I can think of is trying to keep my temper. All I can think of is, "OBEY ME FOR GOD'S SAKE! It's not that hard DAMIT!" And all I can think of is, "I can't wait till your dad get's home and you go to BED!" Which then makes me feel really guilty that I don't have my s#$% together more. That I am not one of those moms who speaks softly and gently and caresses the brows of their sweet cherubs. (I personally don't think they exist. I know too many moms.)

So, how to move on after having one of THOSE soul shattering kind of days?  I pray. I go to bed. I take a break. Get some space for a few minutes. Shake it off and then start again tomorrow, remembering how much I really DO love my two little imps. How Jackson makes me laugh with his CONSTANT questions about EVERYTHING!!!!!! About how much I love seeing him be sweet to his sister and how it makes me so proud when he is kind to people and uses all the manners I have so laboriously tried to teach him.

I remember how Emma is truly a JOY. How she is so determined to be a part of EVERYTHING and do everything her big brother does. I remember how friendly she is to everyone and how much she loves us and loves to show it.

In short, I am blessed!

I have two beautiful, healthy, intelligent kids that make life fun and crazy and enjoyable and horrible at times too. I love being a mom and of course I am far from being the best one out there, I am then one that God gave them, so I better put on my big girl pants and get my S$^% together and be their mom. Nurture, love, play with, discipline, teach.

That's what it's all about.

Funny Things

Jackson in bed getting ready for sleep: "Mama, does snot make honey?"
Me: "No, snot does not make honey?"
Jackson: "What does snot make?"

Jackson: "I like you Mommy. I like you just the way you are. Can you sing me the song Just The Way You Are?"

Emma adores shoes and boots and jackets and throws fits when she doesn't get what she wants. She is such a character. She loves peek - a -boo and wants to play it all the time.

She also loves to be involved in everything and insists on being bigger then she really is. What a hoot. :)

Kiddos and other thoughts.

I keep forgetting to get on here are immortalize all the funny things my kids say and do. But here are a couple of stories.
The other day I was correcting Jackson and telling him to look at my eyes. Emma opened her eyes really wide and looked at me earnestly and said "dis, dis?"
She is so full of spunk and I love her sense of humor. And the fact that she wants to be the one to pick out her clothes and shoes. She's 15 months old!

Jackson, discussing colors he likes, said to Dan "I'm the kind of guy who likes green, brown and blue."

He is getting so big and the things he thinks of and puts together always surprises me. He's very sensitive to ideas about fear and danger and so I am constantly reassuring him about the safety of things.

Emma has been throwing fits about sugar. She LOVES sugar. The more sugar, the better and to heck with all other food. I am waging war on her now to eat what I give her. Not a lot of it if she doesn't like it, but she IS going to eat a couple of bites and I'm not going only give her bread, cheerios and candy. So, that's been fun, but I know it's worth the fight.

She is funny too, because when I look at her and I'm talking to her, she gives such an impression that she understands every word. Maybe it's because she is a lot more engaging then Jackson was, but it makes me feel like she is catching on a lot faster then he did. And because of that I find myself expecting more out of her. She can already follow simple directions really well, which I love. I told her to go get her shoes the other day and she went to her drawer, picked some out and brought them to me. She also put them away when I told her too. She has put her clothes in the basket too.

Jackson is getting more interested in reading stories with me and I love cuddling with him. He often tells me, "I like you Mom." Which is the cutest thing. He is getting really coordinated with his play too. He has been building train tracks a lot and using the road I did on his floor with tape.

It's fun to see him create and pretend. And he's doing well with potty training. He's had some accidents recently, but I think it's more laziness then anything else. I just want to be done with diapers for him.

The last couple of nights Emma has wanted to be rocked to sleep, which is not normal. At the end of the day I am often so tired and so ready to just RELAX, that I have a habit of trying to get the bedtime routine over with as quickly as possible. The kids, and Dan too really, like to drag it out as long as possible. But the other night I was sitting in the dark with a baby who cried and cried every time I put her in her crib and I reminded myself that I have nothing better to do than to snuggle and nurture my baby. I held and sung to her for probably 30 - 45 minutes and she finally passed out in my arms. It was so sweet and she is growing so quickly. I was infinitely more relaxed after I had finally snuck out of the room. And of course, knowing I was there when she needed me, made me feel much better about life in general.

I just need to take the time to enjoy all the moments, even through the fog of tiredness. :)

And she walks!

 Emma is officially walking! Just today she decided she was going for it and took off. Several times she walked across the room. She is so big! She also is talking a bunch. She is saying ball and fish and she is very clear when she is trying to say something that isn't actually English, but she definitely get's her point across.  She also loves to give kisses. Recently, she has wanted to be snuggled before she goes to bed. I hold her with her blanket, and she lays her head down on my shoulder and I sing to her. If she likes the song she'll start singing too. I say singing but it's that little baby thing of aaahhhhh... Then she'll snuggle down again, then look up and pucker up, then snuggle down again. It's so cute! 

She has eight teeth and possibility one more on the way. 

Being a mother SUCKS!

Only sometimes. I'm really tired at the moment and just had the morning from hell, so I'm not really the best advocate for moms at the moment. What do you do with a kid who just wants to be naughty? Nothing I do deters him from being mean to his friends or fighting or just complaining and whining... GRR!
And then when I have him alone, he's all sweet and kind and considerate and I want to yell, "Quick! Look now, World! He really is a wonderful boy!"
He's so frustrating sometimes and so fun and so full of mischief. He loves to fill his dump truck up with rocks and then throw them off the bridge. He loves to muck about in the mud and dirt and he loves to collect rocks.

He's such a boy. I keep reminding myself that he will learn the right things to do, I just have to keep teaching him. He knows exactly what's expected of him, but when I ask him why he got into trouble, he looks up at me with big green eyes, all innocent and says, "don't know".

I do love giving the cuddles and kisses and reading the stories and giving the baths. I love being "mommy" and I love being the one they call. But sometimes I feel like I'm the one who always gets to say "NO!" and the one who gets to heap out correction and punishments for various crimes. I, in essence get to be the "bad guy". Not because I want to be, but because I am on the front line. It starts with me daily. If I don't teach them obedience every day, all day long, they will grow up being little manipulators with no respect for authority. It's SO vital to be the teacher and mother they need me to be, and yet all I want to do sometimes is ignore the naughty, ugly behavior, put a movie on and take a nap.
It's really that I get to mother myself too along with the kids. I have to grow myself up enough to be there for them.
It's so worth it, but so hard to sustain the energy long term.

Emma Joy is one!

It's been a crazy year. It was 32 degrees the evening Emma was born. I was exhausted from no sleep and the emotional HELL of labor and delivery and the nagging questions of, "will I really have her today or will I stall out like last time and have three days of never ending contractions and sleep deprivation?" I don't do well with not being in control and that aspect of labor it the hardest one for me. I don't have any say in when, or how or how long. It happens when it happens and short of going to get induced and taking drugs to deal with the pain of pitocin contractions, there is nothing to be done about it.

My reflections of that day are varied. Some very are very happy and some make me wince. I remember being in so much pain I wanted to go get and epidural at the hospital. I remember that I kept hitting my forehead on the side of the tub, because the deflected pain helped me deal with the overwhelming pain. (I had a bruise for days afterwards.. :)

I remember the amazing feeling of totally relaxing when I got into the hot shower after I had been shaking and shivering and feeling totally tense, out of control and unable to cope. That moment probably marks the greatest polar shift I have ever experienced from horrible discomfort to comfort in a minute.

And of course I remember the moment she came out, the relief of not having to push anymore or have anymore contractions.. (HA! The after birth pain was HORRENDOUS with this second pregnancy. and I hear it gets worse with each child you have.) I picked her up and she was all purple and not breathing, like Jackson, though he was much more limp. Dana came in with the mask and air bag and gave her two puffs and the sweet relief! She coughed and started to squeak and cry a bit.

I also loved just laying there in the bed with her and with Dan beside me. Getting that time, just us, no visitors, no hospital staff, no relatives what probably the highlight for me. I absolutely loved it.

When I look back now, I can see little glimpses of her personality peeping out. I handed her to Dan to get a little snuggling in so I could sit up and focus on the prodding and cramping that was happening to me. She took one sniff of him and let out a yell of protest. "What the heck?! You're NOT my mom!" It's so her.

This little Emma girl is a ball of fire! She has so many quirks and she makes me laugh all the time. She is strong willed and stubborn. (How could she not be with parents such as us?) She loved to be involved with whatever is happening and strongly objects to being marginalized. She threw a fit yesterday when I wouldn't let her crawl down the road with her brother and his friend.

She loved to give little kisses. I rock her for a few minutes before she goes to bed, signing to her and just generally loving on her. She'll cuddle down on my chest with her blanket and her thumb in her mouth, then look up at me and pucker up, kiss me then flop back down. Then she'll do it again. And again. And again. She is just a light. She will smile at anyone and oh my! How this girl loves her Daddy!

She has six teeth going on eight and she is determined to get around. She likes to push chairs and other heavy objects around. I wouldn't be surprised if she is full out walking within the next month. She's long and thin. Very much different then Jackson. (My back still hurts from lugging him around!)
I love her little hands and her narrow little feet. She is in every way a little girl.

I am so blessed to have two such beautiful, fun, lively, engaging children! Will there be a third? Who knows? I just want to focus on how we are now as a family as I now know that time FLIES by, and within a blink of the eye, they are grown up.

The Birthday Party

So finally getting around to blogging again. It takes time. Blah. Anyway, so the party was great and I have some fun pictures and I was really happy with how the cakes turned out.

 

Jackson and Emma's Cakes. Dessert for all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was a fun and busy party and now we don't have to have another one for a YEAR! :)