Look to the hills, from whence comes my help

I've discovered some more things about myself. I wouldn't classify them as good things, but at the same time I can't really call them bad.... I know that there is a lot in my life that I want to change. I want to NOT say bad things about people and make instant horrible judgements about them. I don't want to be so easily fickle when it comes to God. He's given me so much help and so much grace that to not ALWAYS be before Him is the height of ungratfulness. A very exciting thing happened tonight rather. Dan suggested we pray together.. It's incredably exciting when he comes and suggests something that I want, but have always felt to not say until he brings it up. It just shows even more how faithful God is. When we please Him and are obeying Him, He gives us those things that are important to us. That's rather exciting to me. But then again, I also realized how jaded in my view I get. For instance it has been a big deal for Dan and I to do anything together. I want to just give up and pout because of it and that is WRONG!!!!! I am NOT a victom! EVER!!! I have every ability in me to fight and do whatever is required of me.. simply because God's put it there. AND I BELIEVE THAT!!!!!!!!! Now I have to live it.
Hmm. I must go to bed now..

The passing from a youth to an older youth

Well, this week has held many interesting and bizzare turns of events in my life... mostly, I've just discovered that I really have to grow up... No that is not just a statement, but a realization... Dan and I had a large fight.. probably the worst yet, since this time, HE was pissed as heck at me as well as me being pissed as heck at him. The situation escalated and after I sshhhhed him, he stormed from the school, and after a moment of indicision I went after him and yelled at him for leaving something unresolved and told him that since he expected me to always talk things out, he had to do the same.. the point of all that was that we did work it out, but more importantly we learned a wee bit more about each other and about how a relationship, a life-long relationship is going to work... Lots of work... All good though and very much worth it..
The other night we were on tickle.com which is a very fun site to waste a lot of time on... many silly little tests etc.. but they are fun and really amuzing. We found out that we are not "astrologically compatable" (which is mostly his fault because he is a tauras) and that our names "calculated" together only get up to a 79% . Sad.. I guess we better not continue with this...:) I also found out that I am only 75 on a scale of 100 in the realm of sexy..oh well.. I guess I had better work on that:) Anyhoo I just go finished baking my body and runny and I must go shower so I smell nice at dinner. Very important really.. smelling nice...
Love to all

Complete disbelief and anger

WHY!!!!!!!!!!??????? I just DON'T GET IT!!!!!! What would induce some normally sane person to write to a place where they lived a long time ago, or better yet, never lived at all, and try to convince all those poor deranged individuals, who are following blindly and submissively behind a tyrannical. maniac who controls us all, that we are totally off base, and can't see the truth that is slapping us in the face. That really, all us blind folk should listen to THEM instead and see the light that they are shining SO brightly! Wow, sorry I am getting a little sarcastic and a lot worked about this, but honestly.. some people are so stupid and yes I will give names MIKE O"LEARY! I don't know the other man, so I won't abuse him wildly, but I would like to. Lord, help me not be such a nasty person!

Where does laziness come from

I am sitting here at work on a gloriously sunny day, hating being inside, and also wasting my valuable time, NOT doing anything productive... How terrible is that? I can't say that I feel tremendously bad about it really.. In fact I don't feel bad about it at all. I am usually a very productive person, and I love to work hard, but I find when by myself, without any sort of press, I don't do well at all. I can usually force out a couple of hours of work, but then I just get sick of it and stop, and do things like blog... I was really inspired by reading Joahannas blogs, by the by, I miss my best friend! I am TIRED of you being gone and just think, It's just the beginning.. But at least there is Dan... there is always Dan.. What a great consilation! I love him so much.
I have been very surprised by the ability of the heart to expand and explore so unfearingly, previously untrodden ground. It's really fun! I really can't wait to marry him! There is no thought better then that.. not even Hawaii or any other tropical paradice. (Not, of course, suggesting I wouldn't be delighted to have that experience of GOING to one of those places!)
But now, I shall force myself to do a wee bit more work, lest I get home and not like myself as much for no dicipline what-so-ever!