Well, I am sitting here, emotionally traumatized. Not in a bad way at all. The last two days have been very good. I listened to a Sam Fife tape in the cheese room yesterday. It was so good to listen to it. It's really important to know where we come from and how this whole thing started.. (for anyone who doesn't know who Sam Fife is, he was the guy who started the church) The tape was right around the time he was preaching the wilderness message, and he went back and explained exactly why we were moving that way. He talked about when he first heard the Giddeon and his three hundred message from God. How he knew God was telling him that he was seperating a people, a priviledged people, who by loving God and seperating themselves, they would overcome the flesh and be able to defeat death. He talked about the scripture, "By man death, by man also resurrection " In other words it was man who brought the death experience into the world and it's going to be man who defeats death and brings resurrection life. It was so stirring. I was really overwhelmed with the hugeness of this calling. To defeat death. Talk about something to attain to. I also feel so priviledged to have been raised in this move and to have been given understanding and also to see the vision. It's spectacular. Then this morning, instead of having service we gathered and worshipped for about two hours for Mary Elis (who is dying of cancer).. we sang songs and then went into worship and people sang psalms (for those of you who are not familiar with this, it is basically a singing a song to the Lord, one that you make up on the spot. It's very beautiful) and I was so overcome by the cry that God would not leave us in the wilderness but that he would complete this work that He started and not leave us. It's such a beautiful thing. The body, everyone fighting for each other. It was tremendously ecouraging. I was totally broken and stood there crying for a long time. The beauty of what God has done is just incredible. The cry of my heart now is for God to finish it and to keep all those that He has called.
I was talking to Nannette yesterday, talking about marters and stuff, and saying how it's very easy to stay close to the Lord when you are in trouble or fear or danger, but how it's the every day complacence that will kill us. It's so suttle. It sneeks up on you and you don't even realize it, until you're half dead. It's really tricky. I am filled with a hunger for the word. I want to know the foundation, so I can stand when I get shaken. I love this word and I love the vision, I don't ever want to lose that. There is such a confirmation in my spirit about it, and I believe it with all my heart and being. Anyway, I needed to write this before it became less clear and faded.
4 comments:
I always have trouble with a God who's concerned with a special group of people and not the whole world...
Paul, God is concerned with eveyone. Doesn't mean He doesn't pay attention to a group of people. (Look at David and "God's chosen people") And it's you're problem not His if you don't like that. Not everyone sees the same things.. look how many faiths there are and how many denominations in Christianity alone. Everyone has a calling and it's their responsibility to find out what it is and what they believe. My faith is mine, not yours and I wouldn't assume to put it on anyone else. But it's my calling and my faith.
Yanelly, I do have a problem with people believing that other groups of people are inferior to them - that God sets them above the rest. That may not be what you meant nor what the gentleman you quote meant when he said,
"He knew God was telling him that he was seperating a people, a priviledged people..."
But it sure sounds like it. And of course of you're right. People have their own beliefs, and many people don't like to challenge or critically examine those beliefs. So nothing anyone can say can ever make a difference.
A second problem I have is that when people think they are absolutely right in a way that makes others' religious views wrong, it plays into the very egotism and self centeredness that all major religions try to get us to move away from.
Reflect, for example, of the tone of your remark, "And it's you're problem not His if you don't like that." You identify your own thinking squarely with God's - as though you and those who think like you know God's mind and I don't.
And of course many Muslims, for example, and Jews, have the same attitude. And look what it leads to in the world when extremists pick up on it...
Well, here again I have to disagree with you. First you seem to view closemindedness as a harmful, bad thing. While in some ways it can be. Being open to every idea and every faith can also be very detrimental. Take the illustration of marriage. After you have made a commitement to one person, you don't have the same openness to everyone.. or at least you shouldn't. If you always were thinking oh hey this new person sort of suits me a wee bit better and kept trading partners, you would never be in a marriage of any worth. Nor would you really have any sort of commitement. I am saying this because, though I don't think you should cart blanc say someone else's faith is wrong, I don't think you need to examine every detail of every idea of religion and faith. At some point you have to take something for yourself and make it your own. Make it a truth you stand on. At least in my view.
Ok, and about the "special people" thing. It has nothing to do with being better then anyone else, or more in favor with God. Like I said everyone has a different calling. It's not for anyone to decide who's is more imporant. I mean think of the evangelists or the priests or monks who give up their lives to do something they believe brings them closer to God. Of course they think what they do is special, and it is. It's also just different. The world tends to be warry of the unusual and things that don't look the same.
And as for my thinking that God's mind and my mind are the same... hmm not likely. I know that I am where God wants me and doing what he wants me to do, but I wouldn't go as far as saying I have his mind. Also, I wouldn't assume much about you since I don't know you at all, nor do you know me. But if I sounded condesending, it's only because I feel strongly about what I am doing. I've given my life for it, so I'm kind of defensive. Sorry if I came across nastily.
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